Once again the journey begins.

For those who are new to this blog I will like to do a brief re-introduction of the #DiARyOfaGoogLeDad series which I started about 3yrs ago to chronicle my journey through fatherhood without direct elderly support considering both my biological mother and my wife’s mum are both Late. The series highlights our journey of discovery about dealing with the various challenges of raising new borns through online (google and social media) research.

My second child (a girl) came exactly a week ago today 🎉👧🏾 and as a result I have aptly names the continuation of this series DiARyOfaGoogLeDad Season 2. If you missed the first season (spanning episodes 1-5), you can start here.

Now you would think that being a dad for the second time would make things a little easier considering I have gathered sufficient experience from raising my first child- LIE!

Nothing quite prepares you for having a child of a different sex ‘walahi’. For starters the fear and worry of being a good parent and wondering if you would ever be able to fully provide the love and resources never goes away.. my wife and I figured the only way around this is to consciously walk in the knowledge that we are only guardians and that God is the real father of our children and as such while we put in our best humanly possible we keep trusting him to provide all that our children will require.

Secondly, the idea that every child comes with his own care package is something I have gradually accepted  as a reality in my life. Considering that since my son’s arrival, we haven’t wanted for much by way of resources to provide the quality of life our children should have.

Now after huffing and puffing the first time about the circumstances surrounding th birth of my son and how I was done with hospitals in Nigeria, it turned out we had to once again swallow the humble pie and have our second child here again. (I hope our children don’t blame us for their lack of a dual citizenship when they grow up 🤣).

My attitude to life has always been to question everything, there always has to be a reason I would do something I can’t slip into the ‘crowd-mentality’ syndrome as MI calls it. Further more the economics of having a child abroad didn’t make sense to me plus I couldn’t afford it. Further more I mean no offense to everyone who has done this but to be frank I feel like every excuse the proponents of such medical tourism ideology make indirectly rubbishes our faith in God’s ability to provide future tuition money for tertiary education abroad.. (I make no apologies for bringing my faith into every thing I do). Anyways we couldn’t afford it and there was no way I was going to borrow to ensure our second child got that Red or blue ‘Pali’.

Following our first experience we decided to do an elective CS (we couldn’t bear the thought of my wife suffering another 14hr labour) so off we went after a meeting with the Gynae and a clear assessment of the risks we signed a consent form (always found it funny how hospitals and doctors try so hard to cover their ass#s) authorizing the procedure. Fast forward a week we went through the procedure a week earlier than the EDD. We would spend another 4-days in the hospital (I will get to the reason shortly).

So the hospital we use for deliveries had recently been acquired by some capitalist Indians who have been on an acquisition spree of Private hospitals in Lagos. While I have my concerns about the over commercialization of healthcare, one can also make the assumption that usually a change of guard puts staff and key personnel on their toes. Well in this case though the ‘principalities’ that are the nurses and ‘Doctors’ managed to take professionals in healthcare to a new low. Whether it was in the form of intentional forgetfulness or outright laziness we once again came to the conclusions that it is dangerous to go to a Nigerian private hospital without a ‘hot headed’ relative or friend watching your back when you are physically unable to.

After the procedure my daughter seemed fine. She was attended to by 2 peadetricians and it wasn’t until the second day following my wife’s inquisition that we realized that my daughter was slightly jaundiced ( the kind you don’t quickly see on the skin surface and eyes) Her bilirubin reading was 13.4 . Imagine my surprise. I had always heard of this Jaundice of a thing and I had the general idea of the symptoms but until that day, I didn’t know the cause. So in my typical google dad curiosity I took to ‘google the oracle of mankind’ 😀

Basically Jaundice in lay man terms is a condition every new born is susceptible to. It is simply the inability of the child’s liver to quickly breakdown ‘bilirubin’-It is an orange-yellow pigment in the bile that forms as a product of hemoglobin; excess amounts in the blood produce the yellow appearance observed in jaundice.

As I also learned, sometimes when a mother doesn’t lactate quickly and there isn’t enough breast milk to help the child metabolise this substance it can bring it on too..

So we had to spend two more days doing Phototheraphy to destroy the bilirubins photo electronically. I can type now and speak grammar but it wasn’t fun for us parents to watch our new born getting tanned. But THANK GOD it’s all we had to deal with.

So this post is my gratitude to God for blessing us with the Princess of the Daniels dynasty. So as is customary I will run through the lessons from our experience:

1. Never go to a Nigerian hospital for delivery without God and a ‘Crazo-Erazo’ close relative He can use as a whip.

2. Ask questions!! Especially from medical personnel never minding their condescending responses or sometimes bad attitude.

3. If you are unstatisfied with medical explanations, seek a second one or better yet consult google.

In the next episode, I will talk about the peculiarities of caring for a girl child. Please feel free to share this it might help someone.

-@gozzim